Everyone around is coping, struggling. If one starts venting out, the other person does the same. Sometimes, the venting-out session seems like a competition to demonstrate who is leading a more miserable life than the other. While if one switches to social media, the competition takes a 180-degree turn. On the virtual media, the pageant turns into "Who is leading the happiest life?" Fascinating, isn't it?

It is a challenge to be born in a deprived culture; success is difficult to define in such a context. As we grew up, we were conditioned to believe that there was only one way to live: to 'settle' down, study, and get a job. If the job gives access to a life where one can afford a sedan and a two-bedroom hall flat, it is enough, more than enough, to be happy. But then, no one mentioned the dilemmas that shall arise by studying, exposing oneself to rationality and irrationality, learning about poets, dramatists, and artists who never found happiness in materiality, and reading about the lives of saints who renounced the world. Blessed are those on either side - those who do not want clarity or have it entirely because most of us are suffering in between.

Happiness is delusional. One feels one can catch it when one finishes one's studies. But soon, one is duped. Then, one believes to grasp it when one gets a job. But it slips away. Eventually, one feels that one has matured and would now get a hold. It disappears again.

Later in life, the happiest moments are mostly weird - they may occur while listening to a song, gazing at a star, reading a couplet, hearing a joke, watching a fall, or a rise from scratch. They are unusual and don't stay; they touch and vanish. Hence, the chase becomes futile.

What is always faithful is the pain - it stays, very close, very private. It makes the eyes shine and the heart fonder. It provides empathy and love. It carries strength and hope. It brings one closer to others and kindness. It is a far more beautiful emotion, often despised, but it is to be embraced to become a better person.

If one has ever gone through pain, which one had to embrace without any questioning, one would know what this means. Embracing pain is the only way to quit the chase, as the pain is loyal, and happiness is always on the run. So, let it be.

Good Night

October 27, 2024. Sunday. 10.21 PM.